Have you ever paused to think about how you communicate? A thoughtful, encouraging word, an empathetic comment, a compassionate glance … or a careless comment, a rude remark, a sarcastic smirk … what do they really communicate to those closest to you?
Your words have the potential of bringing life or death to the heart of another. Your words, along with underlying attitudes, will either build others up or tear them down, strengthen them in the Lord or weaken their faith. As God's Word says,
“The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” (Proverbs 18:21)
So how do we know when and what to speak? The Bible reveals a lot of wisdom about communication, but if you could distill it down to three key points, three key questions to ask yourself before something comes out of your mouth, they would probably be...
Is it True? Is it Necessary? Is it Loving?
TRUE. Objective truth -- not merely our own feelings or opinions -- is sorely needed today in our world now filled with lies, half-truths, and various points of view. God is truth (Psalm 31:5), and He invites us to reflect His image and truthfulness to the world. So before we speak, we ask ourselves... "Is it true?"
Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth. (1 John 3:18)
NECESSARY. We might possess the truth, but sharing it in the right time and in the right way is critical. Jesus Himself warned about casting your pearls to pigs (Matt. 7:6). Solomon encouraged us to overlook the small stuff (Proverbs 19:11). So we ask ourselves also before we speak... "Is it necessary?"
A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver. (Proverbs 25:11)
LOVING. What we have might even be true and necessary to share, but the spirit in which we share is critical and will help our words accomplish God's purpose. As Christ loved us, so we also seek to be loving in all our deeds and all our words. Our final question we ask ourselves before speaking is... "Is it loving?"
Do everything in love. (1 Corinthians 16:14)
As I mentioned before, the Scriptures are full of great communication concepts to bless us at work and at home. A more complete list may be found here, for example.
What other key concepts for Christian communication would you add to this list? Please share your comments below. ~Brady
